Response to a lie? Grab a beer; scratch and fart.

CBS will be airing an ad during the Super Bowl in which one of the players appears with his mom and talks about how he wasn’t aborted. There will be a song and dance about “Gaaawwwwd!” and “Liiifffe!” and other such poppycock.  What won’t be mentioned is that abortion was (and is) illegal in the Catholic country in which Tebow was conceived and birthed. CBS won’t run ads for liberal groups but it will run an ad for an ultra-conservative group that “may be based on a falsehood”. Uh, gee, ya think?!

An ultra-conservative group or groups who regularly give birth to murderers in the name of Life, might be lying. The only problem with that little sentiment is the “might” part of it. Of course they’re lying. They’ve been fucking lying since their birth from the bowels of the Catholic Church (this links to a .pdf file).

My friends in the liberal camp are all aquiver because CBS is selling ad time to their side but refuses to sell ad time to our side. I’m not sure how that’s new. Marketing is always targeted at the viewing demographic. Guess what this says about the demographic that watches the Super Bowl?

Also, not new, is the liberal response. “Boycott?!” “Not watch the Super Bowl?!” “Are you nuts?!” As usual, liberals can’t be bothered to protest if it might interfere with their entertainment. That’s okay, though. Liberals have a very good and logical excuse reason for not boycotting.

The “logic” goes something like this; boycotts never work so I won’t participate. I (and several thousands of other “I”s) don’t participate so the boycott doesn’t work. Proving that boycotts don’t work; so I won’t participate. I don’t participate so the boycott doesn’t work. Boycotts never work so I won’t participate. No, I’m not stuttering up there. That’s called circular reasoning. It’s called a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Liberals have decided that it’s too much effort to protest or boycott so they’ve given themselves an excuse to not exert themselves. Liberals then complain that their “leadership” doesn’t stand with them. Uh, wouldn’t you actually have to be standing in order for the leadership to stand with you? Perhaps what they really mean is we wish our leadership would stand so we can sit on our lazy asses and pretend to stand for something.

What liberals seem to forget is how many times boycotts have been effectively used by the ultra-conservatives.  Ultra-conservatives have had books banned, including the dictionary for a short time, they have had movies removed from cable and broadcast channels, they have shut down films, and they’ve had Democratic politicians falling all over themselves to apologize for words or actions the ultra-cons themselves have used. But, yeah, boycotts don’t work and liberals take stands; when it’s convenient, when it’s not too uncomfortable, when it concerns them, or, well, maybe not so much.

Now we’re gonna get a dose of deceptive advertising (talk about a redundant phrase; deceptive advertising) and the liberals are going to politely point out that is “may be based on a falsehood.” Don’tcha like that language? Falsehood. You and I would call that a lie. But, marketing, politics, and religion being what they are today, combined with our collective need to appear as though we’re politely minding our manners, and a lie turns into a falsehood. No wonder people have a hard time recognizing the truth. It’s back there hidden behind the bright shiny costumes of “falsehoods” and polite language used to divert and obscure the truth.

If you’re not familiar with the power of words and the use of language and rhetoric to frame opinion and knowledge, go check out Julia Penelope’s, Speaking Freely; Unlearning the Lies of the Fathers’ Tongue or read some George Lakoff. When you’re finished there, you might want to read up on the Father of Public Relations, Edward Bernays and learn how the US Government began the use of tools of conceptual manipulation in the nineteen-teens.

Fight for health care?! The liberals can’t even be bothered to change the channel or turn off the TV for a cause.  Good luck, President Obama. You’re sure gonna need it with this crew helping you with Change they Hope you’ll make for them.

Update on the Parody Pimp

Grounded!

Little Jimmy O’Keefe, the conservative pundits’ little darling, has been ordered to live with his parents as a condition of his release on a $10,000 bond.

The 25-year-old member of the “Gotcha Media,” will have to live with mommy and daddy until his hearing on felony charges he and his fellow conspirators face in their comedic attempt to tamper with a US federal phone system.

I hope his mommy and daddy take the car keys and internet away from this idiot.  He’s already been tweeting about his case which is in violation of some other terms of his release.  Oh, wait.  Maybe not.  Let him keep tweeting and talking.

Hey, Jimmy!  Give mommy back her coat when you see her.

Grounded!

Oh, FFS! Attack of the script kiddies.

Nope.  I’m not going to name them here.  They can get their publicity and their ya-yas from the Corporate Media.

A group of teen aged, script kiddies have defaced about 43 websites of United States elected officials and US official websites. The children in question, have a history of “hacking” websites, more correctly labeled “cracking,” using the Joomla content management system

The “attack,” read temper tantrum, came shortly after President Obama’s State of the Union address.  Their message was as refined and mature as their tantrum. The children responsible have problems with Communism, which I doubt they can define, and President Obama.  Sounds like Republicans to me.

The timing of the temper tantrum is interesting given that it came shortly after the State of the Union speech and one day after a junior, spook-in-training from the Republican camp, Stan Dai, was busted with his fellow conspirators in an attempt to interfere with a federal phone system.

The juvenile crackers claim to be from Brazil and they’ve left messages in Portuguese in previous tantrums. The fact they attack only one type of system is evidence they know nothing more than writing scripts using software designed for them by real hackers.

What a bunch of pathetic children.

Rest in Peace, Dr. Howard Zinn

Dr. Howard Zinn, historian and political activist, died today at the age of 87.

If you’ve not read The People’s History of the United States, I highly recommend you do. History looks so much different from the perspective of “We, the People.”

The Parody Pimp P0wn3d

James O’Keefe, the darling of the “liberal” media outlets whose heavily doctored videos were catapulted onto the national stage by Fox News, Briebert, Limbaugh, Hannity, Beck and other such “liberal” icons, has been busted.

The affidavit reads in part:

{Robert} FLANAGAN and {Joseph} BASEL by fault and fraudulent pretense…did in fact enter, real property belonging to the United States for the purpose of willfully and maliciously interfering with a telephone system operated and controlled by the United State of America. {Who were} aided and abetted by {James} O’KEEFE and {Stan} DAI to commit the entry for the purpose of interfering with the telephone system…all in violation of Title 18, United States Code, Sections 1036, 1362 and 2.

Sons of Plumbers didn’t even bother to wait until after hours as their historic Party Elders had done. The Republican Party has regressed so far as to send man-aged children, incompetent children at that, to do the criminal work The Party doesn’t have the stomach for.

It looks like a “third-rate” imitation of a “third-rate” ratfuck.

Get a load of this outfit. Are you fucking kidding me?

That outfit looks like something dreamed up for Pleasantville meets Reefer Madness during the Blaxploitation period in Hollywood history.

Hey, James! The 70s called, they want their shit back. You make that shit look stupid! Quite a feat given the 70s brought us The Village People.  This getup was the one worn by the conservative darling in his “sting” operation against ACORN.  I’m surprised they didn’t laugh him out of their offices instead of calling the cops on him.

Now, let’s take a look at his fellow conspirators.

The common thread amongst the Sons of Plumbers is their connection with conservative organizations funded by Richard Viguerie and Morton Blackwell. Of course, there are also their connections with the Republican Party.

Conspirator #2. Robert Flanagan, is the son of the acting U.S. Attorney for northern Louisiana, William Flanagan.

Rep. Mary Fallin’s office confirmed Wednesday that Robert Flanagan, who was arrested and charged as part of an alleged scheme to gain access to a U.S. senator’s telephones, worked in her office last year.

Still, press secretary Katie Bruns said the Oklahoma Republican remains a co-sponsor of a congressional resolution honoring one of the other suspects for previous efforts to go undercover and gain information on the Association of Community Organizers for Reform Now, or ACORN.

Read more from this Tulsa World article.

Conspirator #3. Joseph Basel.

While at Morris, Basel founded an on-campus conservative magazine and was one of more than a dozen College Republicans from the school who attended George W. Bush’s 2005 presidential inauguration.

A year later, Basel became the campaign manager for Minnesota Sen. Bill Ingebrigtsen, R-Alexandria. Ingebrigtsen said he’s talked to Basel only a few times since then and was “baffled” by his former aide’s arrest.

Read more from Star Tribune article.

Conspirator #4. Stan Dai is the one found sitting in a car a couple of blocks away with a listening device.

Dai was the editor-in-chief of the GW Patriot, an alternative conservative student newspaper, when he attended The George Washington University in 2006. According to information Dai posted in September 2007 on the university’s online alumni directory, he lived in Naperville, Ill., helped run a “Defense Deparment regional defense counterterrorism/irregular warfare program” and then became assistant director of the Intelligence Community Center of Academic Excellence at Trinity Washington University, which prepares undergraduates for careers in intelligence.

Read more at Nola.com article.

Is this really the quality of person the CIA is recruiting and allowing to recruit for them?  No wonder so many on the right are concerned about our national security.  Look at the examples they have in their camp.

The “liberal” media is of course spinning this as a harmless prank.  Given the double standards in this country, do you think they’d say the same if the Sons of Plumbers had been from the Democratic Party? Of course, this is the “Post 9/11(tm)” world and the Republicans have proven they have no regard for the law.  Perhaps this will be spun into slaps on the wrists for the Sons of Plumbers. I would not be surprised. There are too many Republicans up the chain to think these guys will have to answer for conspiracy.  Or maybe, just maybe, this is too egregious an offense for even the Republicans to spin away.

The Watergate Burglaries were first reported as “third-rate” and a joke.

Ask Nixon how that worked out?

Dear Rahm Emanuel,

You are quoted as saying that the strategy of the liberal groups with whom you have so little in common, is “fucking retarded.”

Once again you show all the verbal finesse of an emotionally retarded stunted, eight-year-old boy enamored of fart jokes and bathroom humor. Not to worry. These days you’re in good company.

As usual, you managed to insult and denigrate those members of your party with whom you don’t agree and you chose to do so using language intended to marginalize and ridicule the less politically powerful among us. I’m surprised you didn’t say, “Eww, that’s so gay.” Isn’t that what juvenile boys say when providing their “manhood” creds?

Let’s move on to your disregard for and apparent disgust with, all things, liberal. Does this ring any bells for you?

“But if by a ‘Liberal’ they mean someone who looks ahead and not behind, someone who welcomes new ideas without rigid reactions, someone who cares about the welfare of the people — their health, their housing, their schools, their jobs, their civil rights, and their civil liberties — someone who believes we can break through the stalemate and suspicions that grip us in our policies abroad, if that is what they mean by a ‘Liberal,’ then I’m proud to say I’m a ‘Liberal.’” John F. Kennedy

What, Mr. Emanuel, would you have said to the late President Kennedy? How would you have responded to his description of liberal? Would you have called it “retarded,” too? Would you have said a strategy that addresses “the welfare of the people — their health, their housing…” is “fucking retarded”? Would you? Would you have had the nerve to say such to President Kennedy?

You’ll notice I said ‘nerve’ and not ‘balls’ there. I know the frat-boy-wanna-be crowd, of which you are obviously a part, tends toward those tough-sounding macho-man adjectives that equate strength and persistence with male body parts. Some of us watching what we affectionately call the Clusterfuck on the Hill, would prefer you actually show some strength and persistence rather than wasting the time to equate it with a body part which apparently looms larger than life in your adolescent minds.

You’re a street thug, Mr. Emanuel. A posturing, immature, petty, vindictive street thug. Did you really take a knife and jam it into a table top? The only thing you’re missing is an incorrectly worn flight suit to display your macho creds. How manly. How tough. How pathetic.

This country has just barely survived eight very long years of small-minded, petty, street thugs parading around the White House attempting to compensate for their short-comings. In doing so, they allowed an attack on US soil, they invaded a sovereign nation, and they damned near killed capitalism single-handedly.

Mr. Emanual, take your street thug theatrics, your juvenile angst for never having been a frat-boy, and your school-yard linguistic skills, and shove them all where the sun don’t shine.

I’m Baaaaack!

The past year has been very ugly for me and my family.  It’s not great now but it is improving.

Time for me to type again.

Web of History

Three jokes equals one snarky commentary

Vampire bat

A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep.

Pretty soon all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it.

He told them to go away and let him get some sleep but they persisted until finally he gave in.

“OK, follow me” he said and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats behind him.

Down through the valley they went, across a river and into a forest full of trees.

Finally he slowed down and all the other bats excitedly milled around him.

“Now, do you see that tree over there?” he asked.

“Yes, Yes, Yes!” the bats all screamed in a frenzy.

“Good” said the bat, “Because I sure as heck didn’t!”

———————-

Speaking of vampires…

10 commandments

The Ten Commandments display was recently removed from the Alabama Supreme Court building. There was a good reason for the move. You can’t post:

Thou Shalt Not Steal
Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery
and
Thou Shall Not Lie

in a building full of lawyers and politicians without creating a hostile work environment.

———————-

Did I mention qualifications?

The Less You Know, The More You Make

“Salary Theorem” states that “Engineers and Scientists can never earn as much as Business Executives and Sales People.”

This theorem can now be supported by a mathematical equation based on the following two postulates:

1. Knowledge is Power.
2. Time is Money.

As every engineer knows:
Power = Work / Time

Since:
Knowledge = Power
Time = Money

It follows that:
Knowledge = Work/Money.

Solving for Money, we get:
Money = Work / Knowledge.

Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity, regardless of the amount of work done.

Conclusion:
The less you know, the more you make.

——————–

Thus ends today’s snarky commentary on the political environment in the US.

Disclaimer: I found the material for this post on the internet. It is not my original work. If you know the original author, please let me know so I may credit them. Thank you.

Media “relations”

Things You Can Learn From Your Dog

- When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.

- Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.

- Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.

- When it’s in your best interest — practice obedience.

- Let others know when they’ve invaded your territory.

- Take naps and stretch before rising.

- Run, romp, and play daily.

- Thrive on attention and let people touch you.

- Avoid biting, when a simple growl will do.

- On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.

- On hot days, drink lots of water and lay under a shady tree.

- When you’re happy, dance around and wag your entire body.

- No matter how often you’re scolded, don’t buy into the guilt thing and pout… run right back and make friends.

- Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.

- Eat with gusto and enthusiasm. Stop when you have had enough.

- Be loyal.

- Never pretend to be something you’re not.

- If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.

- When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by and nuzzle them

Disclaimer: I found the material for this post on the internet.  It is not my original work.  If you know the original author, please let me know so I may credit them.  Thank you.